Read Hannah's story in 1 Samuel chapters 1 and 2 before reading the blog :)
I figured out a way to make my blogs shorter! (Praise the Lord because I can write and talllllllk at times lol) If I let my readers read the scriptures on their own, I won't have to go into too much detail. Why didn't I think about this before? (Don't judge me, my brain has a million things going on all at once) So let's dive in shall we. I'm excited! I love this story :)
Recap: Elkanah had two wives, Peninnah and Hannah. Penninah bore him children and Hannah did not. Penninah made fun of Hannah and treated her poorly because she was barren. What's interesting is that Elkanah loved Hannah more, but despite this, Hannah still wanted a child badly and was in deep anguish because of it. She prayed and prayed for a child and promised that she would give him back to the Lord if he blessed her with one. She got pregnant, she rejoiced and she kept her word. Her baby was called Samuel.
Have you ever wanted something badly? I'm talking about wanting something so badly that you probably had eating, sleeping and relationship difficulties because you lacked whatever it was and it was constantly on your mind. The scriptures said that Hannah was in deep anguish and prayed weeping bitterly to the Lord. She was broken. Isn't it funny that she had her husband's love but it was not enough? (but that's another post) What I want to point out and focus on for the purpose of this blog are her actions. Hannah prayed. She may have been balling her eyes out and depressed, but she prayed her heart out to God. She cried out to him. Have you ever cried out to God? Why is it that we usually use prayer as a last resort? We attempt to seek answers from everybody else or comfort from everyone else before seeking God. "But I don't hear God, he's not going to listen to me!" Really? Because my bible says that if I seek him wholeheartedly he will be found. My bible says the hairs on my head are numbered and I am worth way more than a sparrow. My bible also provides stories of Jesus healing people and bringing them back to life because he was filled with compassion when he saw them weeping. I truly believe God sees and he hears. Every bone in my body believes it, but that was not always the case. In order to know who God is we need to spend time with him, we need to pray.
I admire Hannah so much. You have no idea. Here is a woman, broken to the core, depressed, being teased and belittled all the time because she is without a child and she takes her pain and her needs to God Almighty. She does not complain to her husband. She does not fight back Penninah. She prays. She prays. She prays. Wow. Talk about a strong woman. What would you have done? In addition to humility and an attitude of obedience/servanthood (last post), I am also asking God to give me a praying spirit like Hannah. I want to be able to cry out to him, despite my tears, despite a broken heart, despite the talking behind my back or even to my face. I want to face all that by surrendering to him. I don't want to deal with all of that alone. I don't have to. The invitation is available ... Come to me all who are heavy with burdens... I will give you rest. Nothing in this world can satisfy. He is it. Trust me, i'm pretty sure I've tried everything except drugs and I've seen firsthand that drugs don't satisfy either.
In addition to a praying spirit, I think we should also ask God to give us the strength and desire to keep our word AFTER we receive what we so desperately prayed for. Let's be honest. How many times have you made a promise to God that you did not keep? If you won't be honest I will. I can think of a few things. So thankful that his grace and love knows no bounds and he forgives and gives second, third and fourth etc. chances. Hannah said she would give her son back to the Lord and she did. And guess what? He blessed her with MORE children. Praise God! He is so faithful. He blows my mind, honestly. I am still trying to understand his character. He is officially THE BEST!
This was an important challenge for me. He totally opened up my eyes awhile back. I felt him nudging me to just lay in my bed and talk to him. Like I would talk to a friend. Say it out loud, not just in my heart. "Lord, today was a rough day man. I don't feel like I can do this anymore. God why is it that my heart always ends up broken or rejected? Lord it hurts. I'm worried about....." I'm done using him as a last resort. I pray about any and everything now. I pray over my papers, my conversations with people, my safety, my family and those who hurt me. Yes, I pray for people I don't even speak to anymore. I also pray for my future family. Best believe I'm including some prayers for my future husband (Lord please give him the desire to seek you/continue seeking you) and my kids (Lord please don't let them be bad or let delivery hurt too bad, I am not eve ha! lol) I encourage you to set aside time to just pray to God this week. Each day. He wants to hear from you. He is waiting for you. He wants your heart. Seek him above all else. Cry out to him like Hannah and walk in his favor.
Love you all.
Nto
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